ASK THE COACH
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Solving Money Issues Is Key to Prosperity
By Dr. Ray Angelini
The Saratogian
February 24, 2004
Dear Dr. Ray,
I am a self-employed professional who is doing fairly well financially. However, my moods seem to rise and fall depending on how well or how poorly my business is doing. What can I do to get off this emotional roller coaster?
— P.T. in Malta
Dear P.T.,
We live in a society in which money can rule our lives if we let it. So much of our energy is spent on worrying about, earning, and spending money that it is easy to see how it can assume a place of central importance in our lives. Yet, money has very little to do with what truly makes our lives worthwhile.
As I've said before, money is a means and not an end in itself. We determine what emotional and psychological significance money has in our lives. Each one of us has some sort of psychological relationship to money. How we manage that relationship is key as to whether our relationship with money brings peace and prosperity or desperation and despair.
Kent Nerburn, in his book Simple Truths, offers some basic guidelines as to how to deal peaceably with money. They are:
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Know how to be poor as well as rich.
It is easy to know how to be rich. Knowing how to be poor requires far more effort. Being poor requires that we make the distinction between what we really need and what we merely desire.
It means developing self-discipline, which seems to be a dirty word in our culture. It means developing the skill to learn how to purchase well, and also the self-discipline not to purchase when we can't afford to do so.
Knowing how to be "poor" also means learning to want what you have and not get caught up in the endless cycle of always wanting more.
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Stay away from debt at all costs.
Debt is the greatest enemy of financial well-being and peace of mind. Debt causes us to mortgage our future for the present. When debt defines our future, hope begins to die. Debt causes us to commit money in the future to pay for our past. This is never a good deal! If you are in debt, resolve to pay off your debt as soon as possible.
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Money tends to move away from those who hoard it, and toward those who share it.
Money, like everything, has an energy associated with it. When we hoard money, we restrict the flow of this energy. Sharing frees up this energy and allows it to flow, which inevitably returns to us in the form of abundance of all kinds.
Allow your money to speak the language of sharing, and your life will be filled with more abundance than you can imagine.
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Don't allow yourself to become immobilized by the fear of losing money.
Fear enslaves and cripples us. Fear of losing money or financial security is without a doubt the most common problem I see in my work. Fear binds us up and prevents the flow of all good things into our lives. Nothing should be worth more to us than the emotional, spiritual, and physical well-being of both others and ourselves.
Fears surrounding money rob us of this sense of well-being. Strive to be a giver and sharer, even if financially you feel you can't afford to. Spiritually, you cannot afford not to. If you face your fears about money and dare to be generous, everything else will take care of itself.
