ASK THE COACH
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We Cannot Rely on Pro Athletes as Role Models
By Dr. Ray Angelini
The Saratogian
December 7, 2004
Dear Dr. Ray,
I am the father of two high school-aged boys who are both very active in school sports. The incident that occurred at an NBA game in Detroit a few weeks ago* has increased my concerns as to the kind of role models my sons have in professional athletes. What would you recommend with respect to instilling the right attitude in my sons with respect to sports?
— J.K. in Malta
Dear J.K.,
I, too, am concerned about the example professional athletes set. We as parents have a tremendous responsibility to model attitudes and behavior for our children that are downright counter-cultural. If we expect our children to display good sportsmanship, we cannot rely on professional athletes as role models, but must model that behavior ourselves.
The late Vince Lombardi, the former coach of the Green Bay Packers, was famous for his statement, "Winning isn't the most important thing, it's the only thing." Shortly before his death, Lombardi reflected back on that quote and said, "I wish that I never said it. I meant the effort, I sure didn't mean for players to crush human values and morality."
Good sportsmanship has been defined as the ability to accept winning or losing with equal ease or grace. This is a different goal, especially when we witness a "win at all costs" philosophy, not only at all levels of sports, but in many areas of society as well.
It has been said that good sportsmanship is the golden rule in action. Good sportsmanship needs to have a higher priority than winning. I do not mean to imply that striving to play your best and win is not important, but the words and actions of all of those involved in an athletic event are far more important.
The attitude that how we conduct ourselves in sports is not as important as how we conduct ourselves in other areas of life is all too prevalent. We must remember that the primary goal of playing sports is to teach us about life. At its best, sports should be a training ground for learning about life. What lessons do you want your children to learn from sports? Let it be your goal to have the other team and their fans leave the game bragging about what good sports your children were, rather than how well they performed in the game.
In the long run, good sportsmanship will be remembered far longer than winning, and bad sportsmanship far longer than losing.
*The infamous Pacers-Pistons Brawl (aka The Malice at the Palace or The Basketbrawl) that occurred at the end of a National Basketball Association game between the Detroit Pistons and Indiana Pacers on November 19, 2004 at The Palace of Auburn Hills in Auburn Hills, Michigan.
View a video of this disgraceful event on YouTube »
