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Responsiveness Is Key to Better Stress Tolerance
By Dr. Ray Angelini
The Saratogian
March 28, 2006
In my last column, I wrote about how the power of success can affect our success or failure in our daily endeavors. In today's column, I'd like to discuss how our approach to how we deal with people and situations that can affect how well we cope with life and the inevitable stressors involved.
In any situation, we have basically two modes of responding: reactive and responsive. When we operate from the reactive mode, we feel very stressed and pressured and are quick to judgment. We tend to lose perspective and take things personally.
In this mode, decision-making ability is markedly impaired. Any decision made is usually not a good one, and we easily become too overwrought to function optimally. Resiliency is usually lost or severely minimized, and we lean toward being overly negative or critical.
When we are in the responsive mode, we tend to be more relaxed and are able to focus and have a clearer perspective. Being responsive allows us to be more flexible and increases our ability to deal more effectively with others and confront problems with greater ease and flow.
The key is becoming more aware of which mode you are in at any given time and developing effective techniques of switching from being reactive to responsive.
For example, if you are in the middle of your workday and find that you are not coping particularly well with the current situation, you can step back and begin to acknowledge your reactive state of mind. Just this simple act of acknowledgement can be effective in helping you flip the switch from reactive to responsive mode. Also, taking a break from your current activity can provide an opportunity to clear your head and help move you into a more responsive state of mind.
However, switching modes from reactive to responsive is also a form of being reactive. It is much more preferable and effective to be proactive when it comes to creating and maintaining a responsive state of mind.
I often recommend using the acronym H.A.L.T. as a barometer for consistently maintaining a responsive state of mind. It is extremely difficult to remain responsive if we are too Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired. If we are at a deficit in any one or a combination of these areas, we leave ourselves vulnerable to slipping into the reactive mode.
We need to take great care in resolving any imbalances in these four key areas. Doing so will undoubtedly facilitate a more regular maintenance of the responsive mode and provide more fertile ground for success in coping with job stressors.
